Motherhood can’t be prepared for — Faith

Mrs. Faith Walton

A new mother and real estate consultant, Mrs. Faith Walton, shares her motherhood experience with BUKOLA BAKARE

What is the feeling of motherhood like for you?

I think the joy of having one’s own flesh and blood through birth is absolutely overwhelming. It also comes with inexplicable happiness, so that sums up the feeling for me.

Did anything prepare you for delivery?

Nothing really prepared me for the journey into delivery but I guess when marriage sets in, it would subtly prepare one for such a phase in one’s life.

How do you mean?

Motherhood cannot really be prepared for. Reality begins to set in after that first cry of one’s baby. It is different strokes for different folks. With babies, one has to go with their flow. Also, one is expected to adjust almost immediately to their routine. That’s just the way it is.

How did you handle your daughter’s first week?

My baby’s first week was overwhelming and I was really scared and worried about handling her all by myself without a matron or doctor’s supervision. Babies are very fragile and I did not want to make mistakes with simple techniques such as how to breastfeed properly, positioning to carry her, how to clean her up among other things. Nonetheless, I have been able to adjust.

How supportive has your husband been since the arrival of your bundle of joy?

My husband is my right hand man, from the beginning of my pregnancy till date. He is always ready to listen to my experiences or rants every single day without complaining. He reads and asks questions, he also keeps abreast of information about newborns on blogs.

Motherhood is fraught with some challenges, how have you been able to handle them?

To be honest, I am still dealing with some of these challenges but I seem to learn and adjust every day.  Being a mother, one cannot know it all. One has to keep discovering new things.

What are some of the things you are doing differently now?

The first thing I have noticed is that my sleep pattern has changed automatically. Now, I am getting more alert and attentive to everything around me. I now have to clean the house at a double rate, be more patient and protective. These come with my new role as a mother and I am handling them well.

Are there any myths you heard about motherhood prior to becoming one?

There were too many myths and quite frankly, I did not believe most of them.

Why didn’t you believe most of them? 

I noticed that every woman with a child or children I came in contact with had divergent opinions or advice. Some were reasonable, others annoying so I decided that I only wanted to have my own experience.

Do you have a house help to assist you with house chores while you nurse the baby?

I think that’s a necessity else I would break down from tiredness and stress. Thankfully, my niece is staying with me and helps out with the chores.

What are some of the things your mother told you about motherhood?

Oh, nothing much. She wanted me to experience the journey in my way and not hers. However, she prepared me ahead for the sleepless nights.

Are there some things you have discovered on your own?

One of the things I have discovered is that motherhood involves more than just caring and feeding one’s child. One needs to be patient, cautious, alert and healthy enough to take care of one’s baby. Secondly, every child is different so one should never compare one’s experience with one’s baby to other people’s experiences.

How did you handle labour?

Labour was pretty much smooth for me with no complications and as a first time mother, I was told that I did well at every stage of labour till the birth of my baby.

What is your advice to new mothers?

Every new mother should look forward to motherhood with a positive mind because there will be times the stress and sleepless nights will take its toll on one. They should eat well, rest well and pray always.

What’s your take on infertility in women?

Infertility in women is a big deal and my heart goes out to women in this category. One thing is certain though, nothing is impossible for God. More importantly, we need to consider adoption much more as an option in Nigeria.

There have been debates about the extension of the maternity leave from three months to six months. What is your view on this?

Extending the maternity leave would be a great idea. It would have a huge impact on bonding with our babies, and having time to rest and recuperate after childbirth.

Can you share an unforgettable moment as a new mother?

My unforgettable moment as a new mother remains my loving daughter’s first cry. That moment was priceless.

How many kids would you like to have?

My husband and I plan to have three to five children.

What was the feeling when you held your baby in your arms for the first time?

My baby and I have always shared a bond right from the womb so she recognised my voice from the beginning of my pregnancy. I am still tremendously happy.

Are there things you would have loved to do differently as a mother?

There is nothing I would have love to do differently. I am enjoying motherhood and I am very happy with myself and my child.

What are some of the lessons you have learnt?All mothers that have experienced the birth of a child should be idolised, loved and cared for because it is a milestone.

Punch